The Acceptance.

     My parents and I got into the logistics between accepting a person and approving of their behavior. The example used was when a kids hand gets smacked because they reach for a hot pan. We still accept the child, but their behavior is not okay, so they get punished with a smack on the hand. Just about everyone would agree with this type of swift punishment. The greater good is their health, so a swat on the hand to keep them from third degree burns is acceptable. The problem arises when they get older and start participating in risk taking behaviors where the pay-off may not  be worth the risk. Promiscuity is one of those things. I want my kid to be healthy and safe and hopefully not knocked up, but I also don't want to throw them a spring-break sized supply of condoms and tell them to go wild. If I had my way, my daughter wouldn't know she had a vagina until after she was married. It probably won't work that way, but a father can hope.
     So what's a dad to do? I want her to be safe, I hope she'll be able to talk to Catie or I about that kind of stuff without feeling judged or unaccepted. She needs to know what's right and wrong, and I'm going to tell her. At the same time, if I come down on her too hard, I'm going to push her away and I won't be able to help because she won't listen. If she's going to marry someone I don't approve of, someone that beats her, to "put my foot down" with an emphatic no may do more to solidify her decision than to change her mind. Supporting her while not supporting bad choices is difficult for me. It seems like this is the artisitc part of parenting. Teaching her right from wrong while still letting her know I love her regardless of what she does seems to be at odds with punishing her.